Doctors pronounced a verdict on the 30-year-old teacher, saying that she would never be able to give birth, but she was expecting a baby from a 15-year-old boy.
Five years ago, Svetlana Kurkova experienced a terrible tragedy. She was pregnant, but doctors said her baby died in the seventh week. The husband, instead of supporting the woman, simply abandoned her. Doctors treated the woman for a long time, but in the end they announced the diagnosis - infertility. Svetlana despaired of improving her personal life and began to believe that she was doomed to raising other people's children. But a miracle happened - a woman is expecting a child from her student. The boy wants to become her husband.
Svetlana adored children since childhood, therefore she chose this profession. At 23, Sveta got married, but her husband was very fond of sex, but he did not really want children. Or at least not now. But when the girl became pregnant, he did not react in any way.
In the seventh week, my fetus froze - this is how the doctors say, but in human terms, the child died without even being born, - says Kurkova. - And I will never know who it was - a boy or a girl.
Doctors voiced a lot of reasons why this could happen, but they all had nothing to do with the Light.
This is all because of you! - the distraught Sveta screamed at her husband when he came to her at the hospital. - You didn't want a child!
Or maybe it's all about you? I don't need a sick wife, - said the offended man and since then has not appeared in her ward.
So we parted, - Svetlana recalls.
Oddly enough, the only one who came to Sveta at the hospital was a student Pasha Vorobyov. He brought her a bouquet of flowers and made Sveta smile. After leaving the hospital, Sveta plunged into work. She decided to start a new life, without even trying to return her husband, and constantly dragged the guys on excursions. And yet the same Pasha Vorobyov was always with her everywhere.
I realized that the boy fell in love. He ran after me like he would run after a girl from his class. Well, what of that? I had to deal with my adult life, - says Svetlana.
But in her life, everything was not rosy. Personal life did not work out, the princes could not be seen for a kilometer, but she still wanted a child, despite the words of the doctors. She decided to take extreme measures - to find a man for the night and try to get pregnant like that. And she succeeded. The first time. But the child suffered the same fate. The doctors said they would treat me. Hormone medication was prescribed, but it caused depression, and besides, the teacher got fat. But there was no result.
I had no relationship with any of the men. I always thought I was flawed. And I was afraid to disappoint them, - Svetlana recalls.
When Sveta turned 30, she arranged a holiday in a restaurant. To which I called everyone. And again Pasha was there - he helped to take the boxes home with gifts and flowers.
Only at home did he decide to present his gift - perfume, - smiles Sveta. - And then I kissed him for the first time. She just smacked, and he put up his lips. And, as they say, we sparkled. Pasha says, let's play with a bottle. I laughed: "We are only together!" And suddenly I felt like a young girl who for the first time realizes the excitement from the presence of a young man.
I just want to say in my own defense that I didn't want anything bad. I love Pasha, and he has been in love with me for many years.
Svetlana constantly fought with herself, believed that she was doing the wrong thing, was afraid that everyone would find out everything, but there was no strength to break off the relationship. She was so nervous that when Pasha's parents came to school, the teacher fainted. But, as it turned out, it was not a matter of nerves. Svetlana is pregnant again. And the term is the third month, that is, the dangerous period has already passed.
Now Svetlana went to Pasha's parents.
I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown, so from the doorway I declared that I was pregnant. Pavel's mother began to congratulate me. And then she gasped and clutched at her heart. She understood everything, - says Svetlana. - Later she came to me and cried more than cursed.
The lovers are still together. Svetlana is not going to get married yet, but Pasha wants to marry her beloved. But only after he turns 18.
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The heroine of one of the episodes of the "Male / Female" program was 30-year-old Ekaterina. A social teacher from the village of Firovo, Tver region, gave birth to a son from her 16-year-old student
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Recently, domestic and foreign media have increasingly covered stories that can undermine faith in the sowers of "reasonable, kind, eternal". We are referring to life dramas in which schoolteachers not only seduce their students, but also become pregnant from them.
We will not judge who the injured party is in these stories - for this there are competent authorities, endowed with the appropriate powers (it seems to us that all the actors have a hard time). Our goal is, with the help of experts, to try to understand the motives that drive women from different countries who are ready to raise and educate both a baby and a husband. At the same time, we tried to find out if such couples can live happily ever after.
Double negative selection
The level of expectations that society traditionally places on teachers is extremely high. However, now applicants go to pedagogical universities who are unlikely to enter a more prestigious educational institution. At school, it is often not “teachers from God” who remain to teach, but those who have not been able to find work elsewhere or organize their own business.
“This is called“ double negative selection ”, - psychologist Olga Yurkovskaya shares her thoughts about modern mentors. She invites us to forget about the attitude “teachers are the best people in society” and objectively look at those who choose this profession. Our expert argues logically, but mercilessly harshly, assuring that not all teachers are examples of high morality and ethics.
“The fact that a girl goes to school and teaches a subject is not a guarantor of her ethics. A young teacher today is often a woman who is not very well educated, with a not very developed intellect, who works in a low-paid job and does not have much respect in society. She is constantly faced with the claims of the administration and parents, as well as the rudeness of students and leads a life that is, by and large, joyless, ”Yurkovskaya says.
Naturally, teenagers come to the attention of a school teacher much more often than adult men. And the novice teacher sometimes draws attention to them. Let's try to figure out why.
If a woman does not need a husband, but a boy
The reasons why an adult woman is not interested in relationships with adult men can be very different, sexologist, psychiatrist Yevgeny Kulgavchuk assures us. Here and the lack of demand among men of the same age, and mental disorders, and passion for pornography, which erodes the moral and ethical aspects of sexual behavior. “We cannot rule out both the inability to build relationships and the traumatic sexual experience with peers, after which a woman will look for a safe partner who cannot harm her,” our permanent expert lists frightening options.
It should be noted that pedophilia (and sexual attraction to a 12-year-old child - for example, "the youngest father in New Zealand" can be called pedophilia), is still extremely rare in women and is not a trend. However, sometimes a teacher still begins to “teach” a teenager something completely different from what is usually taught in school, completely forgetting about the existence of the article “child molestation”. Where does this "amnesia" come from?
When the forbidden fruit is sweet
Sexual attraction to a teenager sometimes turns out to be stronger than the prospect of criminal and administrative liability and a ban on working with children. Indeed, on one side of the scale is the notorious condemnation from the side of society (but only if someone finds out, and in fact they may not!). On the other, there are many secret bonuses available right now.
“Many women are flattered by the adolescent's enthusiastic look, because men, spoiled by attention from the fairer sex, have practically forgotten how to look after their chosen one and admire her. Meanwhile, some adolescents-accelerators with premature psychosexual development may have not only that enthusiastic look, but also physical capabilities that are not present in their peers - men with obesity and beer alcoholism, ”says Dr. Kulgavchuk. Due to the so-called endorphin intoxication, a woman may not be fully aware of what is happening.
“Endorphin inebriation reduces criticism. With strong arousal, the same areas of the brain are involved through which drug addiction is formed in a similar way. And drug addicts, as you know, often have less criticism of their behavior. We can say that this is a kind of sexual addiction, ”the sexologist comments on the principle of operation of the biological mechanism.
“At the moment when she wants sex, a woman does not think about the consequences,” Yurkovskaya agrees with him and draws our attention to the psychological aspect of the “dangerous connection”. - A teacher who feels unworthy of either respect or admiration, who does not have a happy personal life, feels attraction and admiration from a young boy. And often she just goes along with her need to have love and appreciation (in principle, this is what we all need as social beings). How to resist forbidden desires, if by realizing them, a woman gets everything that was in short supply? "
Give birth to a child from a child
Our experts gave different answers to the question of what could push a teacher to a very serious decision to give birth to a student.
Evgeny Kulgavchuk is sure that the whole point is "in the mistaken mixture of maternal and sexual." But this, according to the psychiatrist, is "neurotic", "warped" love. The same as in a codependent relationship with an alcoholic who is "saved" by a woman, pitying him.
Fortunately, the sexual attraction of adult women to boys, contrary to biology and common sense, is much less common for codependency.
Psychologist Olga Yurkovskaya believes that this extremely non-pedagogical desire can be explained by the desire to protect herself from young rivals: “Naturally, when an adult woman becomes pregnant, she tries to tie the young man to herself with this child, because she understands that as she grows up, competition among suitable the age of the girls becomes much stronger. "
Does this method work? The scandalous story of an Austrian couple who started dating when Renate was 40 and Erwin was 13 made us think before answering this question again in the negative.
Dangers of "sexy fast food"
A teacher whose relationship with a student falls under the article of the Criminal Code can begin to persecute in social networks and in the press, quickly turning her life into a real hell. However, it is possible that one day a teenager will also have to face delayed, but no less unpleasant, consequences, but in the sexual sphere.
A boy who has entered into a relationship with an adult woman skips some stages of psychosexual development - platonic and erotic - just skips them.
“We can say that a woman takes away from a teenager the opportunity to love, stuffing instead of“ sexual fast food ”. The boy skips classes in the life school of courtship and love longing. And what has not been achieved is often not appreciated. This applies to both toys and women, ”Kulgavchuk is sure.
"In adulthood, when the hormonal background will decrease, some of these men will quickly go 'from the sexual distance', because they have not learned to receive and create emotions from the platonic component of relationships," warns the sexologist.
Our permanent expert is sure that the overwhelming majority of such couples are simply not able to pass the test of time: “At some point, the young man begins to feel ashamed of his former“ beloved ”. And he may even, boasting to his friends about his sexual exploits, humiliate her, because he never learned to take care and appreciate his partner. Also, some teenagers understand that women also used them for their own purposes. The lack of common interests, the future, the absence of a solid foundation of relations, as well as the condemnation of others make such "alliances" hopeless. " And extremely rare exceptions, which will also be discussed in our gallery, only confirm this rule.
Viewers of Andrei Malakhov's "Live" program heard the story of 32-year-old Ekaterina Eliseeva. A teacher from the village of Firovo, Tver region, told the whole country that a year ago she gave birth to a child from her student, a 16-year-old boy Artyom E. In a home video, a one-year-old baby is walking in the courtyard of a private house. The alleged father recognized his son, but does not take part in his upbringing. He fled to Moscow, distributes leaflets on the street and lives in a hostel for guest workers. The viewers of the program unanimously condemned the teacher of free morals and took pity on the "unfortunate teenager."
The story began two years ago. Social educator Ekaterina Eliseeva started an affair with a second-year eighth grader. They met not at school, but at the village disco. After the dance, the woman invited a group of teenagers to her home. It was there that it turned out that the boy goes to school where she works. The incipient feeling was intensified by alcohol intoxication and slow dancing until the morning. Since that evening, Artyom E. often visited the young teacher, the romance between them was gaining momentum. After six months of relationship, Ekaterina Eliseeva became pregnant. Artyom's mother was categorically against the birth of a grandson. She threw a grandiose scandal to her son and potential daughter-in-law. Mom demanded to end the relationship and have an abortion.
Catherine was deprived of the right to engage in teaching and was given six months conditionally, because at the time of the novel, the guy was only 15 years old - he had not reached the age of sexual consent. And her lover went to work in Moscow. The teacher was left, ridiculed by everyone, without work, with two children in her arms (the eldest son from his first marriage is nine years old). On the air of the program, former lovers met and talked about how to live on. They will not restore relations, but the young father promised to help his son.
A similar incident occurred in Ulan-Ude. In March of this year, the head teacher for educational work of one of the city's schools withdrew from the decree and began to work. It would seem an ordinary event, if not for one "but". She gave birth to a baby from her student, with whom she had lived for a year before. The most interesting thing is that everyone knew about the teacher's novel: from students and watchmen to teachers and the director. But none of them interfered with their relationship.
Two years ago, a 28-year-old teacher from the Volgograd region, Angelina Dorofeeva, became pregnant by a 15-year-old teenager. The boy's parents found out about the intimate relationship between them, who discovered love correspondence on social networks. The parents immediately filed a complaint with the law enforcement agencies. The teacher fully admitted her guilt, saying that she had met the boy for over a month. The visits were regular and took place at his home.
A certain transformation is taking place on our television, and the course that it preaches is not to my liking at all. Andrey Malakhov became the leader of these changes. The last year's scandal with 15-year-old Diana Shurygina was not enough for him, he decided this year to drag the 15-year-old boy into these squabbles. However, if the story with Shurygina was, albeit scandalous, but among adolescents, then in this case we are talking about pedophilia. Moreover, about the sexual relationship of a teacher and a student. Suddenly she felt herself a victim in this story and even claims alimony. I just have one question. Andrey Malakhov, is this serious? He decided to take pity on the "lost" pedophile? It seems to me that such stories not only have no place on television, but also the heroization of a woman who, in fact, is a latent criminal, looks strange. It is high time for Malakhov to think about the moral character of his own program. At the moment, this is an absolute bottom.
Vadim Manukyan
Member of the Expert Council for the Development of the Information Society and the Media under the State Duma of the Russian Federation
For a 16-year-old boy, having sex with a teacher twice as old is, as a rule, “cool” and “high”, you can brag to your friends. Like, look - I'm not just having sex (not everyone does it at 16), but I also do it with a teacher. In addition, guys at the age of 16 have hypersexuality: they don't care where, it doesn't matter, with whom, as long as they have sex. Another moment - people, entering into an intimate relationship, seem to be on the same level. The young man seems to himself more mature, and the woman - younger and fresher, it turns out "mutually beneficial cooperation." It is also possible to transfer some parental traits to the teacher. The boy has a bad relationship with his mother, and the teacher is understanding. The teenager is looking for the perfect mom in her, and sex is a "by-product".