Every person's life can be moderately difficult and moderately good. The most important thing is to be able to extract the experience that various situations bring us, so that they do not repeat themselves in the future, or, on the contrary, repeat themselves if they are good situations. We have collected phrases that will be useful to you in different occasions in life.
- My life is a train. In my best moments, it seemed to me that I was in control of him. At worst, I imagined myself as a passenger. And sometimes I realize that I am lying on the rails.
- Appreciate people who can see three things in you: the sadness behind the smile, the love behind the anger, and the reason for your silence.
- Learn to ignore people who don't like you. Because people who don’t like you are of two types: they are either stupid or envious. The fools will love you in a year, and the envious ones will die without knowing the secret of your superiority over them.
- Cherish every second of life, if you love, love, if you miss, tell me, if you hate, forget, don’t waste time on hatred, because there is so little time to live...
- While you are thinking about whether you are on the right path with the person or not, he has time to stop wanting to go somewhere with you...
- Strong people speak to their faces. Weak people open their dirty mouths behind their backs. When suddenly the desire to live disappeared...
- When life hits you painfully from all sides... And everything suddenly becomes indifferent to your heart... Be patient and believe that this will all pass!
- Don't be afraid to lose those who weren't afraid to lose you.
- What is wealth? Wealth is the health of a mother, respect from a father, the loyalty of friends and the love of a dear person.
- Fate is not a matter of chance, but a matter of choice. There is no need to wait for it, it needs to be created.
- If a smart thought comes to you and you are looking for somewhere to write it down, this is an aphorism, and if you are thinking about how to implement it, this is a really smart thought.
- Don’t listen to anyone, have your own opinion, your own head, your own thoughts and ideas, plans for life. Never chase anyone. Go your own way and don’t care what they say behind your back. They talked, they talk and will always talk. That should not be of your concerns. Love. Create. Dream and smile more often.
- A man who gives his woman wings will never wear horns!
- There is no need to be afraid of anything. Take risks, even if you make a mistake. That's life.
- Before pouring out your soul, make sure that the “vessel” is not leaking.
- Not necessarily the person who raised his son, built a house, planted a tree - a real man. Very often this is an ordinary woman.
- Smart thoughts come only when all the stupid things have already been done.
- You will meet in 25 years the one whom you considered a prince at 18... and you understand - what a blessing it is that he rode on his horse... PAST!
- Nobody knows how fate will turn out. Live freely and don't be afraid of change. When the Lord takes something away, don't miss what he gives in return.
- Don’t be afraid to give warming words and do good deeds. The more wood you put on the fire, the more heat will return. (Omar Khayyam)
- There is a category of people who will always love you despite your difficult character... so appreciate them.
- No matter how strong a woman is, she waits for a man stronger than herself... and not so that he limits her freedom, but so that he gives her the right to be weak
Time passes, but one thing remains unchanged: people do not value good treatment. Once you come to someone’s aid, the person will have to do it constantly: refusals are not accepted. Although gratitude for a good attitude sometimes happens, this is the exception rather than the rule. Surely everyone is familiar with the gospel story about how Jesus healed 10 sick people, but only one thanked him. And this is not the first evidence of human ingratitude.
An innate property of higher animals
Not only psychologists, moralists and researchers of ethical sciences, but also ordinary scientists, in particular zoologists, tried to answer the question of why people do not value good treatment. Thus, Konrad Lorenz, an Austrian zoologist and animal psychologist, shed some light on the cause of human ingratitude. He studied animal behavior for a long time and came to the conclusion that aggression is an innate quality of higher animals.
There is also intraspecific aggression, when representatives of one species attack their own kind when they enter their territory. This behavior helps to survive in the wild.
Invasion and Morality
Even without a scientific basis, it is easy to determine that intraspecific aggression is also characteristic of people, they just call it differently - competitive struggle. For example, in one city there are two photo studios. They are located in different parts of the city, and the owners are even friends. But if one of them opens his own studio next to a competitor, then a fierce struggle and poaching of clients will begin, because such an act is an encroachment on someone else’s territory.
This suggests a simple conclusion: by nature, man is angry, but at the same time a social being. To survive, he needs to learn to exist with his own kind, therefore in society there are morals, rules of behavior and other laws. To reduce someone's aggression, people try to express submission. And the conclusion that suggests itself: gratitude and good attitude are perceived as weakness. Everyone expects to be treated well, but no one wants to do it in return.
A person, doing good to someone, transcends his natural egoism and wants this “sacrifice” to be appreciated. If someone sees himself treated well, he feels superior. And this pleases the ego. This is why people don't appreciate good attitude.
How to respond to ingratitude?
It has long been known that people do not value good treatment. And during this time, many sayings have accumulated. They say that you cannot provide services where they are not asked.
Treat others the way they treat you.
Do not provide benefits that are not asked of you.
Do good and throw it into the water.
Praise, like gold and diamond, has value only when it is rare.
Don't look for scoundrels; good people commit scoundrels.
Despite the fact that man is a rational being and must act rationally, most human actions are performed under the influence of instincts, not reason. Because everyone has instincts, but fate has deprived some of them of education and prudence.
From Shakespeare
Well, we’ve sorted out science and instincts, it’s time to move on to philosophy, ethics and aesthetics. And, perhaps, let's start with Shakespeare. Another famous playwright of the past wondered:
Is there anything more monstrous than human ingratitude?
Unfortunately, he was never able to answer it. People did not and do not value good relations either then or now. As soon as you help someone unselfishly, instead of gratitude, the person is given the obligation to help constantly. It’s not for nothing that they say that as soon as you help someone a couple of times, someone’s legs immediately begin to hang from their neck. People take kindness for granted and are very offended when they are refused.
Goethe once said that ingratitude is a common weakness. Outstanding people never allow themselves to be ungrateful. In any case, they will find a way to thank the one who helped them, and will never forget the service provided to them.
Without a fool life is bad
There are many aphorisms about when people do not value a good attitude. One of them is especially worth highlighting:
There must always be fools in the world who sacrifice personal interests for the sake of public interests, receiving in return reproach and ingratitude (Alexander Hamilton).
Perhaps if everyone minded their own business exclusively, there would be no society as such. Perhaps anarchy would reign everywhere, people would look at each other like a wolf and see their enemy in everyone they met. Only due to the fact that there are people who will not spare themselves for the good of others, society somehow resembles a civilized society. But even here there are many unpleasant situations that cannot be dealt with.
When they don't appreciate
People don't appreciate good attitude. More than one or two quotes can be given on this matter. The most unpleasant thing is when, for the sake of another person, you have to do unseemly, sometimes even illegal, things.
Ingratitude never hurts the human heart more than when it comes from people for whose sake we decided to do something unseemly (Henry Fielding, The Story of Tom Jones).
They say that it is not common for victors to remember those who cleared the path to the throne for them with swords. This truth is as old as the world, but not a single ruler has yet disdained it.
Demonstrative gratitude, a few words, a certificate, a medal or a posthumous speech are formalities, not gratitude. Indeed, the game will continue until the king falls, and no matter how many pawns lie near his throne. But one day fate will begin to take revenge, and then the one who did not know how to appreciate a good attitude towards himself will find himself in the place of the one he offended. Life is incredibly wise, so don’t dwell on the bad, one day everything will fall into place, the mosaic will come together and everything will be as it should be. The main thing is not to forget to thank fate for this.
Live forever and learn... And yet... Wisdom does not come to everyone over the years... One does not become wise, one is born wise... It just reveals itself later...
Especially for our readers, we have selected the 30 best quotes of the week.
1. Don’t complain about life - someone dreams of the kind of life you live.
2. The main rule of life is not to let yourself be broken by either people or circumstances.
3. Never show a man how much you need him. You won't see anything good in return.
4. You cannot expect from a person what is unusual for him. You don't squeeze a lemon to get tomato juice.
5. After rain, a rainbow always comes, after tears - happiness.
6. One day, completely by accident, you will find yourself in the right place at the right time, and millions of roads will converge at one point.
7. What you believe in becomes your world.
8. A diamond that falls into the mud still remains a diamond, and dust that rises to the skies remains dust.
9. They don’t call, don’t write, aren’t interested - that means they don’t need it. Everything is simple and there is nothing to invent here.
10. I know people are not saints. Sins are written by fate. For me, it’s better to be honestly evil than people with false kindness!
11. Be like a lotus that is always pure and blooms even in muddy water.
12. And God grant everyone to be with someone with whom the heart does not seek others.
13. There is no better place than home, especially if there is a mother in it.
14. People constantly invent problems for themselves. Why not invent happiness for yourself?
15. It hurts when a child wants to see mom and dad, but they are not there. The rest can be lived through.
16. Happiness is nearby... Don’t invent ideals for yourself... Appreciate what you have.
17. Never lie to someone who trusts you. Never trust someone who lied to you.
18. Mom, even if she is prickly, is still the best!
19. There is no need to be afraid of distances. And far away you can love deeply, and close you can quickly part.
20. I always consider the last book I read to be the best until I take on something new.
21. We give children LIFE, and they give us MEANING!
22. Happy man- this is someone who does not regret the past, is not afraid of the future and does not interfere in other people's lives.
23. Pain sometimes goes away, but thoughts remain.
24. How much wisdom is needed to never lose kindness!
25. Having abandoned me once, don’t interfere in my life again. Never.
26. Appreciate someone who can’t live without you. And don't chase after someone who is happy without you.
27. Remember: you attract to yourself what you believe in!
28. You can only regret one thing in life - that you never took a risk.
29. The most natural thing in this world is change. Living things cannot be frozen.
30. One wise man was asked: “What to do if someone stops loving you?”
“Take your soul and leave,” he replied.
Don't forget to tell your loved ones how dear they are to you. Give them enough attention. Your relationship may end someday, but even if something doesn't last forever, that doesn't mean it's not worth your time.
If you're not sure if this is love
This is Love? Or just affection?
Almost all of us have friends who jump from relationship to relationship, and each time they insist that they “absolutely and unconditionally love.”
For those of us who have been out of a relationship for longer than the duration of their several relationships combined, it is completely incomprehensible how anyone could “love” so many people at once.
I mean, let's be honest. This is not love. This is the fear of loneliness. Right?
Yes and no. It's all about what we feel.
But what if our feelings deceive us? What if we are just so damn scared of being alone that anyone who gives us the slightest sense of security and comfort immediately passes for a soul mate?
You know that epiphany when, several months after a breakup, it becomes difficult to believe that you even said those three magic words to someone you wouldn’t even want to be around today?
And it’s impossible to understand how I could love someone so ridiculous? Someone so unsuitable? So superficial?
Well, it just wasn't love. It was affection.
I don't know for sure if your love is true or if it's a relationship for the sake of a relationship, but I can show you a few general indicators. These are the kinds of things you can point out to a friend when he or she seems to be getting too attached to a one-night stand.
Because you probably wouldn’t want to attend a wedding where one of the newlyweds said “he/she is just always around” as the reason for the event. And if you doubt the motives of your own love, also run through these 6 points to determine whether your efforts are worth the time invested.
Love is passion; affection - indifference
Here we are talking about behavior during separation. They say that the closest feeling to love is a feeling of hatred, which is why after a breakup, all that beautiful, sincere love turns into rage and ardent, unaccountable hatred.
When you are simply attached to a person, you will never become so angry. You will experience anxiety or irritation, but these anxious feelings will not lead you to something as strong and meaningful as real hatred.
Love is unconditional; attachment is self-centered
When you love, all your thoughts are devoted to this person. For the first time in your life, someone else's needs come before yours.
The only reason you buy a new bed is because now you have someone to share it with. Everything you do for your partner has a little bit of satisfaction in mind as well.